All I want for Christmas is....

Some sleep!  

*Josh fell asleep waiting in line 2.5 hours to see Santa.

Don't bite the hand that feeds you

Josh (to my mom at lunch): "What's a gigabyte?"

*What 4 year old asks these kinds of questions?  Tim's!

The Candyman Can....

Tim: "Stop messing with me....my tummy is sensitive now....I think I ate too much candy."

*I was tickling him.  What makes this SO funny is that Tim ate too much candy.  He is ALWAYS eating candy and in the almost 8 years I have known him he has NEVER uttered those words.

Talk to the hand

Josh did something and I asked him to stop.  He continued and started to get ugly with me.  I told him to go to his room when he made a hand gesture similar to "stop" (one palm up the other hand ridge down on top).  I gave him "the look"

Josh: "what? I was practicing my sign language"

Dumb and dumber

Tim: "so, what's the dumbest thing you've ever done?"
Me: "define dumb...."

A Hot Mess

Josh: "I am way smarter than you."
Me: "Oh yeah?  Why do you think that?"
Josh: "I can do things better than you."
Me: "Like what?"
Josh: "Like make a mess!!!!"
Me: "You got that right!"