To my anonymous web stalker...

Get a life.  You obviously have some serious problems.  It is comical yet sad at the same time that you anonymously post negative comments to my blog.  I don't know which is worse - the fact that you have nothing better to do than obsess over what I am up to, the fact that you are completely chicken shit, or the fact that you must be a complete dumbass to think that I would let the comments be posted publicly. 

Wanna get high?

Josh: "Pass the weed."
Tim: "What?!?"
Josh: "Pass the weed....to the rrriiiigggghhhhttt"

******It is now time to STOP listening to Kottonmouth Kings in the car when Josh is with me.******

One Liners

Me: "What's up, chicken butt?"
Josh: "If I'm a chicken butt, you can eat me for dinner."

This is something that has been going back and forth for several weeks now.

So has this one:

Me: "Hey...Fill in the blank"
Josh: "Hey is for horses."

What have I created?  Little copycat.  This is my favorite and should be my most shameful, but gives me the most giggles:

Josh: "Tough titty said the kitty."

Lastly:

Me: "Josh, what do you say to pretty ladies?"
Josh: "Yo baby!  What's up?"

We also give "good hugs" now.  This is where you squeeze so tight a fart comes out.   We usually just pretend and make a "fart" noise...usually.  They are called "juicy hugs" when the real deal happens.

Making a bit of a stink.

Josh: "WIPE ME UUUUPPPPP....."
Me: "Woah.  You stink!"
Josh: "Yeah, I pooped.  I had a lot to eat.  I had all of my favorites.  I pooped out all my food.  Pop tarts.  Cookies.  Milk.  A bar...and french fries."

Game On!

So, on our bike ride tonight my bike and I got into a fight with a stationary trash can.  The trash can won.  It seriously was like a remake of  the scene in "Wayne's World" where Stacy (Psycho Hose Beast) flips her bike over a parked car while her head was turned talking to Wayne.  I was Stacy, my mom was Wayne, and the trash can was the parked car.

Diggin for Gold.

Me: "Ewww....you have some kinda nasty up in your nose."
Josh: "Yeah.  Boogies.  You should probably take my nose off and put a new one on."